Ten fingers, ten toes…

When you’re pregnant you don’t really think about the fact that you are going to be raising an actual human being. A whole person is your responsibility. As bizarre as that sounds, you don’t. You don’t think about the ‘long run.’ All you’re wrapped up in is the fact you’re having a baby. A tiny human that you created. The tiny baby vests, the mini babygrows, the little nappies that are no doubt piled higher than any other pile of baby stuff you have acquired. Your very own baby is going to be using these things. Ten fingers, ten toes, two eyes, one nose and a pouting little rosebud mouth.

They become actual functioning humans so fast haha. Time really does fly. I have one daughter and whilst it’s cliche, I honestly wouldn’t change her for the world. It didn’t really dawn on me that she was going to be an adult one day until she was probably about 7/8 years old. I started to realise that she’ll be out in the real world one day and I really don’t want to be one of those people that raised an asshole.

When they begin school they change. Their personalities start to shine through even more and you start to see a mini adult in the making. Whilst watching your child blossom is a pleasure, it’s also completely and utterly terrifying. You suddenly become aware of the ginormous job ahead of you.

I’m not a super strict parent in my opinion. She will be 10 years old this coming Saturday and I can’t quite believe that I’ve almost survived a decade with this sassy pants. Whilst I’m not strict, there are restrictions. I’m going to list mine and if you’re willing then you can comment your opinion, feedback or even your rules. I’m not saying my way is the right way, but it’s definitely the right way for me. I don’t think there’s a “perfect” way to raise a child, I think we all do our best and have our own individual ways. Let me know in the comments.

School terms.

  • No tablet/laptop until after school work is completed and lunch for the following day is prepped.
  • Bedtime is 7.30/8.00pm sharp depending on tiredness.
  • No TV on at bedtime.
  • 1 hour and 30 minutes screen time. Either on the iPad or on the laptop.
  • No technology before school.

Half terms/School holidays.

  • Bedtime 9.00pm depending on tiredness.
  • No more than 3 hours on technology.

That’s it. I don’t think that’s super strict at all. Some people think I’m too laid back with my daughter but I have to disagree. It’s nobody’s business to be honest and I don’t have to explain the way I parent at all. I am really aware that we live in a world where a lot of kids hide things from their parents. I hope she feels I’m open and easy to talk to as she grows. Here’s another list (because every mum appreciates a list) of things I personally think our children should be taught…

  • You can be anything you want to be, there are no restrictions.
  • Any sexuality you choose is okay, there is no right or wrong when it comes to this. Love is love.
  • You are enough.
  • Be you always. Express yourself any way you wish.
  • Be kind. Always think before you speak (something I have learnt the hard way.)
  • Talk. Cliche again but, “A problem shared is a problem solved.”
  • Don’t be afraid to show your emotions, crying isn’t a sign of weakness and laughter and happiness is one of the greatest sights in life.

Parenting is tough but nothing brings me more happiness than knowing I get to do it with another part of me. When I think of all the tough times we have been through and are still going through, instead of dwelling, I think of how far we have come. I think of how far I have come, not only as a mum but also as a person. I’ve truly grown in the last few years and my eyes have been opened to everything around me. When I’m no longer around, there will still be a part of me left here. Not only for the duration of her life but also for the duration of future family members. We all as parents leave something behind, a little piece of you living inside your own miniature, and that I think, is the greatest achievement and blessing of all.

Kimmi’s Qualms Xx

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